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| Overkill. |
One day while shopping for cough drops at CVS #1 I noticed that there was a locked cabinet that contained all condoms and condom related things (cough drops live next to the condoms I guess). Apparently this is a thing: CVS has a condom problem. I decided that this was probably because people might steal condoms?...I guess? My most prevalent thought was "man it would be embarrassing to have to ask for those". When I moved two years ago I started shopping more at CVS #2. One day, as I stared blankly at the dish soap, I noticed that there was a locked cabinet that contained all candles and candle related things.
Apparently the CVS on Clark/Division doesn't think you should buy candles or candle related things without employee supervision. The condoms were free and clear sitting on a shelf over in the pharmacy and I think they even have Dayquil sitting around there (though I've had to get a special receipt and talk to 5 people to get it from a Target before). But candles...candles are a problem. This CVS even has a call button next to their locked candle display. It looks suspiciously like one of those Easy buttons from Staples and I have, in the past, been tempted to push it and run away just to see if it actually does anything. But when I first saw the locked cabinet full of candles my most prevalent thought was "man it would be embarrassing to have to ask for those".
No one just knows which candle they want, picks it up and walks away with it. You have to smell the candles to know which one is the best. So when you push their easy button (possibly made of plastic and connected to nothing), do you have to make the CVS employee stand there while you smell all the candles and make the best choice? Will they leave you alone while you make your very important air freshening decisions? Is it in their job description to give you their opinion on what they think smells best? "Does this really smell like fresh linen?" "How does Glade know what cashmere woods smell like?"...also, what ARE cashmere woods exactly?" Like a fall afternoon with a hint of sweater.
This leads me to wonder who decides what gets to be locked up in a box at CVS. Does every CVS have a locked cabinet and it's up to the manager to decide what goes inside? If this is the case, I can only determine that whoever runs the CVS at Clark/Division has a horrible fear of open flame and misleadingly descriptive product names. I guess I'll never know. But I do know that if you need condoms you should go to the CVS on Clark/Division and if you need candles you should go to the one on State/Division. Otherwise you're going to have to talk to someone...and that's something I generally try to avoid.
